Plans & Rambles

I need a plan. Ever since I can remember, I've been a "writer". But the funny thing is, when I started to really write big stories, I've never finished them. Thus, my need for a plan.

I am currently working on a "novel", but I have no idea where it is going. I guess I need to start thinking...

I have several ideas about what I'm including, but no real storyline, ya know? I'm not entirely sure how this is going to end up - I don't want it to be boring, or dull. So I am on the brink of thoughts and research. I love writing so this shouldn't be so hard, but even the best of writers are sure to get stuck from time to time. Does that make me a good writer? Maybe not. But I want to finish this thing and say, hey I did it. I actually finished a story I started.

I may end up going back to all those other unfinished 'books' and so some recreating!

I am your Shield - By Rachel Wissmann

My child are you discouraged,

by the sorrows of the day?

Does it seem that life is troubling;

the skies have turned to gray?

Don't forget I gave you promises,

to guide you every hour.

In the moment of your heartbreak,

let me show you my great power!

And I will be your shield, When the battle rages on.

And I will be your light, when the way ahead is long.

Just place your life completely in my hands.

I know it won't be easy,

I never said it would.

But my grace will always be there;

My plans for you are good.

Remember that my weaknesses,

are perfect in my sight,

only when you give them to me,

can I turn them into might.

And I will be your shield, When the battle rages on.

And I will be your light, when the way ahead is long.

Just place your life completely in my hands.

And someday you'll understand,

why I sent this trial

and someday you will see the end,

and know it's all worthwhile!

And I will be your shield, When the battle rages on.

And I will be your light, when the way ahead is long.

Just place your life completely in my hands.

Morning chillness

 "My voice You shall hear in the morning,

  O Lord;

In the morning I will direct it to You,

And I will look up."

~Psalm 5:3~

Chilled and cold was the morning of now
Silence began, but quite didn't know how.

Loud chirps and small were the creatures of here
Whistles and bells weren't too far from my ear.

The moon and the stars gave off their dim light
And whispers of His peace came flying through the night.

But this night was not night, it was morning at 4
When the sun came and shone, tucked inside mountains floor.

One whisper, one song; my heart was renewed
My voice You shall hear, I will lift it to You.

From the Journal of a Fearful Heart

 I was reading some previous journal entries in, well, my journal today. Everything I've written lines up with the same topic: fear. This is a prayer I wrote and I wanted to share it with you, my friends.

Father, You know me. Heck, You created this 'thing'. But even though everyday I see this 'thing' of imperfect-ness, You don't view me as a 'thing'. No, I am Your princess! And because You know and understand me, You know how much I struggle. Despite my laziness, my excuses, my fear, doubt, and whatever else is getting in the way of EVERYTHING You're calling me to, You know its hard for me. Please help me Lord. Change my heart and turn me around. You do know my (confused) heart. And my motives. Help me to see this life as my only true chance of doing Your work. Help the fear I struggle with. I need You're supernatural power in my life. Even though I tell everyone, "You don't understand!", its great to know that You do. How? I don't know. 


You know me God. There are things I don't really like about myself. Help me to know the difference between knowing when I need to change myself, and when I need to accept myself. I want to love me. Plain, old, simple me. My potter, You have formed and fashioned me. I am still the clay, and You're not done molding me are You? You're still forming me. Although I yell, "Ouch!" once in a while, (okay, all the time) I want to have full confidence in knowing You need to do that in order to make me into a young lady You meant me to be."

Look Up in the Morning.

  "Wake up."  Lilah was fast asleep, until she heard a small voice like still waters. She checked her clock. 4:12am. Determined to go back to sleep, she rested her head and shut her heavy eyelids.
  "Wake up," she heard it again. What was compelling her to wake up? She didn't know what to do.
  "Lord? Is that You?" she asked in confusion.
  "Wake up," He answered. He continued, "Wake up and go outside." Lilah willingly got up, put on her shoes and sweater, and at 4:15 in the morning, stepped into the quiet chillness of the early morning.
  "Lord! Look at this! I've never seen anything like this!" Lilah was staring at a big moon. She could perfectly see the outline of its half. Stars were brightly lit all around, and she felt a small sweet breeze sweep upon her face. She closed her eyes. From behind her house, the small creek flowed. She heard crickets and frogs saying their good mornings. Her heart was so overwhelmed with a love; a peace that she's never felt.
  "Oh Lord! she whispered." 'My voice you shall hear in the morning, In the morning I will direct it to You, and I will look up.' " Lilah stared at the glowing moon for a long time. She remembered a verse from Psalms she learned in church. "When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, the moon and the stars, which You have ordained." Lilah slowly lifted her head, and placed her hand on her heart, and said,
  "Oh, how You've captured my heart. You have awoken me to feel You. To actually see You. And to know you more. I love this."


I like to think that when I am suddenly awoken in the very early morning, I'm being so sweetly awoken by God. It seems bittersweet, because you are so tired. 4:00 in the morning! But at the same time, you are given a chance to spend a precious moment with God - to hear His voice - to witness a beautiful feeling even though its more than a feeling. It can't really be explained. It has to be experienced - it has to be seen with your own eyes and felt with your own heart and soul. And when you do--that my friends is the most perfect thing in the whole world.

Whispers in The Night

  Cricket, cricket, cried the nighttime bugs. Swish, swish, cried the wind.
All joining in to play a perfect melody as the moon gave off its light and the stars twinkled like perfect diamonds on black silk.

  "How far do you think the stars are from us?" 6 year old Johnny asked his older brother Wilson.
"I don't know. Pretty far, I guess." he replied.
"Do you think some day I'll get to go up there?" Then he paused, with a twinkle in his eyes and said, "And touch one?" Johnny's older brother chuckled to himself and rested his hand on Johnny's shoulder. Not wanting to sound discouraging, Wilson said,
"I think if you really wanted to, you could."
"Do you think that I will ever get to fly?" Then as if Wilson's heart melted before him, tears welded up in his eyes. Johnny's cancer hadn't gotten better, and Wilson knew it.
"Johnny, I think if you really wanted to, you could fly straight up to the moon."
"You really think so?" With heavy breath, Wilson replied,
"Yes, Johnny. I do."

  Two weeks later, Johnny died. Memories of him flooded Wilson one late night. He was gazing at the stars. Then as if compelled to, Wilson silently prayed,
"God? Uh, hi. You know Johnny, right? My little brother? Well, not too long ago he told me a few things. I know he's up there with You now. I know he feels better. I wanted to ask You, if You could do something for me. You see, Johnny told me he wanted to fly. He wanted to touch the stars and fly to the moon. If it is possible, do you think you can take him? I know it sure would make him happy. Thanks, God."

  Wilson sat there staring up at the moon, in the same spot him and Johnny sat. Silently he whispered,
"Sure bet you're up on the moon right now Johnny. Right now, with God at your side."

Separation: The world--Part 1

"Separation?" he asked, squirming in his chair.
 "From what?"
 "All that is of filthiness and wickedness. From the world and its pleasures."
"But Lord, how can I live in the world and not 'be friends with it'. I don't want to be friends with it, I just am."
"I know child, I know. But don't you know that to be friends with the world is to hate Me?" He said lovingly.
"No. I didn't know that. I do love You. But I......"
"There are no 'buts' when it comes to Me and my Word. I never said it was okay to compromise. When I said total separation, I meant total separation. Submit yourself to Me. Resist the devil, and he will flee."
"I feel so angry all the time. It's hard to get a long with others. When I'm asked to do something I don't like, I complain. How am I supposed to submit myself to You when I can't do anything right? When I am so imperfect? When all I do is mess up?" he asked in an impatient voice.
"Anger my Child, does not bring righteousness I desire. And love is not rude. And yes, do things with grumbling is not what I desire either. All these things are found in the Word. Did you know that if you pursue righteousness and love, you will find life? You will find prosperity and honor? That if you seek Me, in the hope that you will find Me, you will. Because child, I am not far from you. And in Me, you live and move and have your being.. "


{Verses used in this story:
James 1:21, James 4:4, James 4:7, James 4:20, 1 Corinthians 13:5, Philippians 2:14, Proverbs 21:21, and Acts 17:27-28.}

Separation.
 That's a scary word if you ask me. You mean, if I want to follow God as close as possible I have to purposefully give up "myself"? There are many things I do that are totally contrary to the things and ways of God.

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Your ways are not My ways, and you thoughts are not My thoughts.
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Like for example. T.V. The shows/movies we watch. Is there a speck of filth, sin, wickedness, or evil in any type of show you watch? I am taking a big step by saying this, but I can find all that in a show like Hannah Montana or Wizards of Waverly Place. Evaluate the episodes. I used to LOVE those shows. But can you love filth, sin, wickedness, evil etc and love God?
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"Get rid of all moral filth and evil." ~James 4:12~
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"Where is there evil and filth in Hannah Montana?" you may ask.
It's supposed to be a Disney Channel show for kids and teens. I see immodesty. The Bible talks about immodesty. I see lying and disrespect towards parents and each other.The Bible talks about these very subjects.
Before I go on, I want you to understand that I struggle on a day to day basis to follow the Bible as opposed to following the world. I ain't perfect! And I know these people are not as well. But I have to say, you know, these shows are teaching many people (especially kids) ways of living totally contrary to the Bible! This is where the total separation comes in. You may be saying, "What I want to do I don't do, and what I hate---I do." (~Romans 7:15~)
That's totally me! The things I don't want to do, I end up doing anyway. And I've noticed that I--me--moi...put myself in a situation where I have to choose the right thing.

I asked my self awhile back, "If I am not being benefited from this T.V show why watch it? And if it is going against what the Bible says, why put this stuff before my eyes?"
After saying those very words, I ended up putting it before my eyes anyway. See? It's hard. It is and there is no doubt about it. This messed up world made us all think that this stuff is harmless. "Oh, its okay to watch this. Whats a little harmless fun going to do?"

Well, that "harmless fun" does a lot of harm. I don't want to be apart of something the world thinks is okay, when I know for fact that it's not okay with God. A. W  Tozer said,

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To be right with God has often meant to be in trouble with the world. ~Unknown
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When the Holy Spirit fills us, we see that this world's seductive attractions are only cheap substitutes for what god has to offer. ~Unknown
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Life is hard, I know. And having to actually live in this gross world, we are also called to be different in it. And that is hard. 
Separation.